I want to live in Miami, and wake up to “Thank you for being a friend…”
In honor of some of the funniest lines ever written, a helping of Golden Girls (note: some of the lines are funny in context, like if you can hear Sophia’s voice in your head…)
Blanche: Well, just tell him you have a lot of work at home.
Rose: I don’t want to lie.
Blanche: When you get home, we’ll make you clean out the garage.
Rose: Oh thanks, I owe you big for this one.
Dorothy: Blanche, are you sure you’re pregnant?
Blanche: I just did a home pregnancy test – it’s right here.
Rose: It looks like a perfume sample.
Dorothy: Put it behind your ears, Rose.
Blanche: You know what the worst part about getting older is?
Dorothy: Your face, Rose’s hands?
Blanche: The Great Herring War?
Rose: Between the Lindstroms and the Johannsens.
Dorothy: Oh, THAT Great Herring War.
Blanche: No, no, no please. I cannot bear that again. She was listening to her car radio, Big Band, not all talk. There was a contest. Something about a little voice, a lucky number and a dime in a door handle, then Bim Bam Boosh, won the tickets.
Dorothy: Take a lesson Rose. That’s how you tell a story.
Dorothy: You’ll have to excuse my mother. She suffered a slight stroke a few years ago which rendered her totally annoying.
Blanche: Is that all you Italians know how to do? Scream and hit?
Sophia: No, we also know how to make love and sing opera!
Blanche: Rose, you must be confused. You come to me if you have problems with a man. You go to Dorothy if there’s some grammar you need help with.
Dorothy: You ended that sentence with a dangling preposition just to bait me!
Blanche: What would I do that for?